It's the penultimate episode of Big Brother 19. The Final 3 celebrate and reflect, giving us a clip show. But the good news is that all of the clips are things we didn't get to see. There are new showmances (Christmas and Paul) and new fights (Kevin going off on Alex, Matt and Raven). And if you didn't already love Cody, you will because he continues to be portrayed as the hero, a sweet, loving dad. There's also a rat (literal), a snake (metaphoric) and Kevin possibly being in the mob.
And we see the start of part 1 of the final HoH competition, and it features unicorn farts. No, seriously, there are unicorns that fart colored dust and glitter.
The Final 3
Paul, Josh and Christmas celebrate being the Final 3, with Paul taking credit for dragging them both to the end. Josh freaks out because he was the underdog the whole time. Christmas is happy to be there with her teammates. Paul brags about how impressive he is for making it to the finale again. Christmas doesn't know who she'd take to the Final 2. Josh wants to take out Paul and go with Christmas.
As the Final 3 enjoys a delicious meal, they reminisce about the season and we get to see a lot of clips we didn't see the first time around.
Showmance Clips
-Even though Josh doesn't think that Jody was a real showmance, we get a segment about them, centering on Cody telling Jessica about his daughter. It's very sweet, with Cody bragging about how his kid is smart and pretty, not one of those "booger eaters."
-There's a whole segment about Paul and Christmas' relationship, with lots of flirting and cuddling. Josh feels like a third wheel. Christmas admits that Paul makes her smile and gives her the giggles. They also show the viral clip of Christmas in the HoH bed watching Paul and talking to herself about how her heart is getting away from her. Wow, they are making her look like a girl in love.
-Matt and Raven's showmance segment is about them throwing food on each other. They make a total mess, with Matt mocking her and Raven going nuclear.
Kevin Clips
-We see Kevin telling Matt that he won the $25,000, claiming that he didn't tell anyone else. This is absurd revisionist history because Paul has known the entire time. Why is the show blatantly lying to us about this? Matt tells Paul and Raven and Kevin finds out and confronts Matt, denying that he told him anything. Kevin says Matt made it up and Kevin gets into a big fight with Matt, Raven and Alex. Kevin, Raven and Alex yell, calling each other bad game players. They're all correct.
-Kevin gets another segment about his various gangster stories. The other HGs aren't sure if he's actually in the mob.
-Kevin tells Jason about his father going to jail and losing his house to pay the lawyers. Wow, Kevin is getting a lot of time in this clip show. I feel like they're pushing hard for him to win America's Favorite Player.
Rat, Snake and Fight Clips
-There was an actual, literal rat in the kitchen. Josh is terrified while Paul hunts the rat. They sprinkle cheese on the floor to lure it out and trap it under a pot, like a Bugs Bunny cartoon.
-We get a repeat of the whole "Dominique calls Paul a snake" drama, now with more footage of their fight. In hindsight, Dominique was 100 percent correct in her claim that Paul used his status as a vet to trick people into thinking he had all of the answers.
-There's more of the ugly fights with Paul rallying everyone against Jody and Mark standing up for Cody, resulting in Josh unleashing his pots and pans wrath on him. Why are they reminding us of when Josh was an asshole?
-They revisit the three Den of Temptation offers, with Paul and Christmas gloating about winning while Josh questions why Jessica won the Halting Hex. Thanks for reminding us that this twist is a huge reason why Paul and Christmas are still in the game.
-There's a great diary room montage with everyone talking about how much they hate each other. There are also a lot of tears and a surprisingly large amount of Cameron. It's basically all Mark and Josh crying, with Cody hilariously calling this season's guys pathetic.
The Final HoH, Part 1
The episode ends with Paul, Josh and Christmas starting part 1 of the final HoH competition, and yes, Christmas is eligible to play. They stand on a cloud and hold a rope coming out of a unicorn's butt. The last person to hold themselves up wins. The unicorns fart giant clouds of glitter and colored dust.
The two-hour Big Brother 19 finale airs Wednesday at 8/7c on CBS.
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